Roll With SF's Fogust Like A Local
Sure, it's cold or whatever. COULD BE WORSE.
August 7, 2017
By Richie Nakano | Image Tom Stahl via iStock
Summers in San Francisco aren’t really summers at all.
Sure, Golden Gate Park is a little more crowded with tourists, but don’t count on any sun-soaked picnics—summer weather here is dominated by gray skies and chilly temperatures. Sorry, suckers who packed shorts and tank tops, but we locals embrace it. Chilly temps mean it’s never too hot for hot pot, and steaming bowls of ramen don't add another layer of sweat to your tortured body. And, we're so hell-bent on having a summer, damn it, that the cold weather doesn’t stop us from waiting in line for ice cream either.
My personal wardrobe doesn't contain shorts or tank tops—but I do own like 15 light jackets. Fogust, to me, is one of the best parts of living in San Francisco—you're never sweaty, you never wind up posting on Facebook about the heat, and you can drink your coffee hot. Here's five of the best ways to embrace our weird semi-season:
“It’s just chicken noodle soup” said the tech bro before I pushed him in front of a Muni car. The pho ga at Turtle Tower is a lot of things; hangover cure, cold remedy and perfect for a chilly day in SF. There are three locations and they all offer respite from something unpleasant —the Tenderloin, the SF County Jail, and the Outer Richmond District. (Seriously: SUNSET DISTRICT FOR LYFE.)
2) Drinking a whole bottle of wine at the beach.
I love Ocean Beach in the same way I love my flawed, shitty friends. It's gross and kind of useless but it's convenient and you can get away with almost anything on it. The move is: go to Fatted Calf, get a couple bottles of wine, a sandwich, and a pretzel. Drive to the beach. Not the crowded part by the park — drive down to Lawton. Don't bring a blanket, because Ocean Beach is way too windy to sit down. Drink your wine, straight from the bottle, alone or with a friend. Bonus points if it's low tide and you walk out on a sandbar to do your boozing. Related: don't die, that beach is fucking dangerous.
3) Freeze your ass off so you can freeze your hands off at Mitchell's Ice Cream.
So you just did omakase at Ichi, or ate three pizzas at Pizza Hacker, or drank like seven dollar-Tecates at El Rio, and now it's ice cream time. Walk over to Mitchell's and get in line and shiver your way inside, mean-mugging the dude that's sampling literally everything and holding up the line. When you get to the front, sample everything and hold up the line—you earned it.
4) Irish coffees at a Giants game
The Giants are terrible, but whiskey and coffee are kind of the best, so lately we’ve been drowning our baseball sorrows in booze and caffeine. They come in embarrassing cups that are somewhere between a champagne flute and a coffee mug, but they dull the pain of the bullpen giving up four runs in the 9th and warm you up a bit in the process.
5) Eat food on a pier
Okay, there are only two acceptable ways to do this—and I swear to god if someone tries to bring up Pier 39, we are fighting. Way #1 is The Ferry Plaza Farmers Market. Go to Primavera, get the tacos and chilaquiles, then go eat on one of the rotting pieces of wood over by the water. It's cold and miserable but the food is great and you can Instagram the bridge or the Gandhi statue or even both if you're a thirsty extra trash hype beast. Way #2: drive across the Golden Gate to Fish in Sausalito and eat clam chowder and drink Anchor Steam while you watch wealthy people polish their yachts.