By Richie Nakano | Collage ChefsFeed

There’s nothing the food world loves more than trying to predict the next big culinary trends. (The suspense!)


Everyone wants to be serving/eating/Instagramming The Next Big Thing before it’s actually The Next Big Thing, and therefore not cool to talk about anymore. To serve these needs and afflictions, we have scoured the Earth (Internet) for the next hype beast dishes you'll need to know before your aunt catches wise.    

Food Piles

There’s nothing your inner child with a credit card loves more than a waffle cone piled high with 10 scoops, a bloody mary topped with eight pieces of fried chicken, or a kid’s swimming pool filled with In-N-Out Animal Style fries. Think paella pans lined with nachos, topped with a pound of pulled pork, four racks of ribs, a dozen fried eggs, and hot sauce. Think four dozen donuts piled high with whipped cream, hot fudge, a Costco pack of Kit-Kats, sprinkles, and 24 Zima’s flavored with green apple Jolly Ranchers. Think the KFC Double Down, only instead of chicken thighs, it’s a turkey, butterflied open and breaded in Doritos and waffle fries.  

We expect this trend to trickle up (the ol’ reverse-trickle) to the fine dining crowd, as well: no more dishes swooshed on the edge of custom pottery plates—flavors shall be assembled in one haphazard gourmet jumble©.  

Grain Sacks


As popular as Food Piles will be, the athleisure-wearing, Soul Cycle class-Instagramming crowd needs to eat too (maybe?). The days of acai bowls and green juice seem so passé — you know what the fitness crowd needs? Grain sacks. Burlap sacks, filled with ancient grains, soaked until the seeds sprout, then garnished with bird seed, avocado oil, radishes, more seeds, microgreens, bee pollen, and more seeds. Lugging it will tone your arms or something.  


Appetizer Samplers


Remember when you would go to Chili’s with your friends and family, and they would order an appetizer sampler and let you drink bottomless sodas, and you would go home and be like “I HATE YOU DAD, I WANNA GO LIVE WITH RONNIE’S FAMILY.” Now imagine that experience, only you’re at Lazy Bear and there’s 30% less family trauma. Imagine the “snacks” portion of a fine dining meal, only it’s all on one platter and isn't disappointing.
 


The Bespoke Avocado Pit


It’s $18, and you can carry it around like the talisman your busy life demands. Like that crystal thing that's popular now, only slimy and from an avocado.  


Re-Claiming Culturally Appropriated Dishes


There’s almost nothing hotter in the food world lately than outrage over cultural appropriation. (Unless you're talking about outrage over the outrage over cultural appropriation. That might be hotter.) To serve that interest, we offer: Chefs from cultures that have been appropriated, reclaiming what’s been adapted, in a straight-up manner with no adjustments. High-end omakase sushi chefs offering tempura hot dogs. Enrique Olvera hawking poorly constructed burritos stuffed with tater tots. Charles Phan making a $26 banh mi on Dutch Crunch with hot dog relish, only it actually tastes good because he's Charles Phan. Carlos Salgado making $300 "interpretative fajitas," only they actually taste good and don't leave you filled with anguish and regret. 





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